Center Stage

During my mostly unproductive day today, I have managed to catch the critically-acclaimed film Center Stage on HBO not just once--but twice!

Like The Hills and Sloppy Firsts, this movie is a guilty pleasure. It is simultaneously the best and worst movie ever made. The acting is atrocious, the plot sucks, the characters aren't even likable. Somehow, though, it is incredible. I can't peel my eyes away. And, in contrast to when I watch, say, The Hills, which I watch to fuel my inner hatred, I watch Center Stage to fuel my LOVE OF DANCE!

Brief synopsis: Jodi Sawyer loves to dance, and foregoes the opportunity to attend a proper university to pursue her dream of becoming a ballerina. She attends the American Ballet Academy, where she meets many an unlikable girl and guy, and she doesn't fit in. She's too fat and has bad feet. She sleeps with one of the instructors, thinks immediately that they're on their way to the altar, and acts like a complete idiot for 90 minutes. Along the way, said dance instructor breaks her heart but rekindles her love for dance with his unconventional style. Like I said, amazing.

When I watch any kind of dance movie, it makes me want to jump around the house and show off my moves, which is unfortunate because my moves are terrible. Picture a mentally handicapped robot made of lead. I blame it on the years my parents forced me to attend Southern Baptist school (basically Footloose). Here's a game. Can you tell which picture is of characters from Center Stage and which picture is of me?

See that food in the background on the TV? That's stuff dancers aren't allowed to eat. Center Stage does have an eating disorder subplot.

It's hard to go through life being a terrible dancer, but at least I get to eat pizza.