This and That

1.  Ladies and gentlemen, it's Snuggie weather time!  The other night I snuggied up on the couch with the dog (who does not, for some reason, own his own Snuggie).  If it gets any colder outside it's going to be lying-on-the-couch-in-a-sleeping-bag weather.  Whoop, whoop!

2.  Informal poll.  Are you tired all the time?  Because I'm tired all the time, and I can't decide if this fatigue is A.) a result of my weird sleep habits and caffeine addiction, B.) just part of being a grown-up, or C.) some kind of health problem.

3.  And, just in case you need to see how tired I look all the time, here's my school picture.  (By the way, I think that one of the very worst parts of my job is the fact that I'm forced to take school pictures that will be featured in a yearbook.)  This is what I look like at 9:45 a.m. with no makeup, and little will to live.  In my defense, I had just spent the last hour of my life corralling primping ninth graders through a stuffy hallway,  trying to get about 25 of them to keep from screaming and touching each other while standing in line.  The only somewhat redeeming thing about this photo is that I had actually brushed my hair that morning.   

And how's this for a before and after?  That's what 12 years, hatred in your heart, and a love for baked goods will do to you.

4.  We've had two fun new meals this week: Quick Dirty Rice from Our Life in the Kitchen, and Cheesy Beefy Potato Soup from My Fiance Likes It So It Must Be Good.  Both were very, very tasty.  Both will be made again.

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5. My eleventh graders have figured out that if they want to get me off-topic, all they need to do is bring up Amber from Teen Mom.  Is that bitch in jail yet?  Or at least sterilized?

6. Bought the first two book of The Hunger Games series for Chloe [but really for Matt who wanted an excuse to read them].  I kind of want to read them, but I'm afraid that they'll give me bad dreams. 

7.  The election was a bit of a suckfest--an expected suckfest, but a suckfest nonetheless.  At least most of the craziest of the crazies lost, right?  Hey, but did you hear that Sean from the Boston season of The Real World is now a Representative from Wisconsin? You know, the lumberjack guy who married the crazy girl who made out with Puck on the San Francisco season of The Real World.  If I remember right, I liked him (Sean, not Puck).  Did you watch the Boston season?  It was the one with Elka and Genesis and Montana (Basically during MTV's phase of selecting only cast members who had silly names.  Now they just try to find the person who's most likely to do steroids and botox and take 50 shots in a hour's time.).

8. I seriously have the best mother-in-law.  The other night I was talking to her about how I can't seem to find any good baking chocolate in Savannah, and today I got this in the mail.  I love her.

9. Tomorrow Matty and I will be attending a showing of The River Why at the Savannah Film Festival.  We're excited because we got free tickets (old roommate Cris is a baller who scores free stuff for us), but mostly because it stars Zach Gilford (a.k.a. MATT SARACEN!).  It basically looks like a modern-day A River Runs Through It, which is awesome because I LOVE A River Runs Through It. 

10.  Just spent a good chunk of my night making candied pecans and caramel.  Get ready for something tasty!

Oh, Friday, where have you been all my life--or, for the last six days?

Cold Front

There seems to be a cold front moving through the SAV.  Now, I don't really know anything about weather (except that a tropical storm becomes a hurricane when it has 75 mph winds), and I usually don't care all that much.  And I really don't understand all that high pressure/low pressure jibba jabba.  Anyway, this is a cold front, I've decided, because finally it's cooler than 90 degrees outside.
 
Shoot, it was so cool today (uh, 87 or so) that I had to find my Snuggie at naptime.  (You probably think that's a lie.  It is not a lie.)  And I'm not the only one who's chilly.  Look who I found out at the Carport Bistro!

It's Linus!  Linus the Lizard!

This isn't the first time lizards have found solace in the warm glow of the bistro's lanterns.  Last October I met Leopold, Linus's great uncle. 

But I think Linus is cuter.

Brrrrrrrrrr!

A few weeks back, I was experiencing a bad case of weather envy. Every single person I know, it seemed, was posting pictures of pretty snow over sparkly Christmas lights, and I was sitting down here in stupid old hot humid Savannah wearing flip flops and a tshirt.

My memory of winter is basically this:

Beautiful, snowy Wilson Hall. Snow days and hot chocolate and hats and coats and scarves (the more garish, the better).

Oh, and my hair always looks so much better in the cold. That's probably because when it's cold I abandon my usual "beauty" routine of going to bed with my hair wet and then throwing it in a very messy ponytail. Instead, I blow dry it and--GASP!--brush it. When it's done I look like a real girl.

I seem to have forgotten about what a cold winter is really like. For the last week it's been in the thirties here during the day, and the twenties and teens at night. That's really f'ing cold! That's Maryland cold!

I forgot about dry itchy skin and having to start my car ten minutes before I leave for work. I forgot about the fact that cold weather makes me, well, cold. And cold isn't so comfortable.

When Shipley gave me my Snuggie last spring, I never thought it'd get this much use! Hell, the Snuggie is even all dirty on the bottom since I've been walking around the house and yard wearing it. (Matt is proud and the neighbors think I'm crazy.)

Tip: you can use a scarf to tie around your waist so that you can walk around wearing the Snuggie.

Now, I don't usually share with you my keen sense of fashion because I don't want to alienate people who may be less fashionable than I am. I know that I'm a regular Lauren Conrad when it comes to clothes, and not everyone can be a Lauren Conrad, so please don't feel intimidated when you view the following.

I give you. . .Snuggie fashion.

Here I was on my way to watch a soccer game.

Happy Hump Day! Keep warm!

New Snuggie Commercial

The people who created the Snuggie ad campaign are hilarious geniuses. What I wouldn't give to be in the room with these people while they're brainstorming. (I imagine it's a lot like when Uncle Jesse and Uncle Joey were in the advertising business.)

"Wearing snuggies at the movies! Snuggie game night! Snuggies for dogs! The dog will be reading a book and wearing glasses! Ha! Let's do it!"

Matt pointed out the best part of the commercial to me last night: when everyone is at the soccer game in Snuggies, cheering, warm and happy, there is one person who is not happy. He's in the bottom left corner, and he's grumpy and cold. Should've brought his Snuggie.

Snuggie's commercials are so over the top and ridiculous that we can't help but pay attention. And the price point is perfect, too. I'll spend $15 or less on a funny gift for a friend (or for my dog), but anything more than that just seems irresponsible. And, by the way, Snuggies are perfect for those days when you just want to lie on the couch, eat cookies, and pretend to be paralyzed. We joke, but those things are fantastic.

Summer Consequence

Oh dear God.

If you've been keeping up with the blog, then you know that I've spent the last two months of my life drinking massive amounts of boxed wine, baking and eating dozens of cupcakes, napping with the dog, and completely abandoning any semblance of a healthy lifestyle.

And it's all caught up with me. School starts tomorrow.

Tonight I went to the closet to pick out something to wear for the big first day of school. You know, something modest but nice, something that says, "I'm your bitchy teacher; fear me." (I haven't so much as looked at my school clothes since June 12.)

So I grabbed one of my 5 pairs of black pants, and put them on--barely. Uh oh. And then I tried on the other 4, and it wasn't pretty.

"But, you know, I just washed them and I just ate dinner and I'm pretty sure I'm retaining water."

Yeah, right.

I can't, in good conscience, even pretend that those are the reasons for this, shall we say, "growth." The real reason is that I've been in an eating contest with myself for the last two months, and the consequence is a body that's spilling out of my teacher clothes.

I know what I have to do, and it's not a pill or a binge diet or some other "get thin fast" kind of gimmick. Tomorrow I'm going to have to reconcile with Jillian Michaels and the elliptical machine and the Wii Fit balance board.

And I have to get back to daily plate (amazing online calorie counter!) and stop eating like it's my last day to live or like I'm in a hurry to have my leg amputated.

But, still I face the immediate question about what to wear for my first day of school, and the Snuggie may be the only thing that fits me right now.

At least they come in a variety of colors and patterns. And at least I have cute shoes!

Christmas Gift Idea!

When Mitch is doing something ridiculously cute, Matt and I will often joke that he's in a cute contest with himself (because, really, who else would be able to compete?).

Well, it appears that the makers of the Snuggie are in a contest with themselves to create and market the silliest of products. The Snuggie itself wasn't enough. NOW AVAILABLE--Snuggie for Dogs! Click here to watch the promotional video. (Thank you, Cassie, for making me aware of this wonderful item!)

But who am I to talk shit? Not only am I the proud owner of a Snuggie, but I actually use it on occasion, and I want to make homemade Snuggies for all of my friends when I get more savvy with the sewing machine.

This time next year, there will be something different about that picture. Well, two things. I will most likely be 50 pounds lighter (ha!), and Mitch will be wearing his Snuggie as well.

Do you have a Snuggie? Do you wish you had a Snuggie, or at minimum, a Snuggie for your dog?