Taking It Easy

Monday the nurse at my doctor's office (oh yeah, because my doctor is on f'ing vacation right now!) basically ordered me not to do anything until Saturday because we're holding out for Sunday when my doctor gets back.*  No cooking, no cleaning, no nothing.  I am allowed to go to work, but I'm to stay seated as much as possible.  So that's been fun.  Except that it hasn't.  I mean, I can lie around like a sloth with the best of 'em, but I really don't want anyone telling me that I have to.

So super husband Matt has been doting on me, fetching me drinks and handfuls of Reese's pieces (why did I think it wise to buy a 10-lb. bag of them?) and being fun and cooking awesome dinners.  Sweet snuggle pup has been sweet and snuggly. And since we rushed to compete every pre-baby task last week, I have nothing to do now except sit around and get fatter and ponder such depressing questions as, "Did my water break, or am I really just that bad at controlling my bladder?"**

I think this has been the longest week of my life.  For serious.  And it hasn't been bad necessarily.  Just boring.  And weird.  I'm trying to soak up and enjoy our last moments as a trio, and trying to not sully them by complaining about discomfort or boredom or the fact that I get too hot when I lie on the couch for 6 hours.  I'm also totally exploiting the fact that people answer the phone really quickly when I call because they think that I am calling to tell them that I am in labor.  

I've been working so hard at school to make sure that everything is in place that I just today realized that I have, at maximum 17 more days with students between now and August.  (!)  So that made me pretty happy.  Plus, Mad Men's coming back on Sunday, and The Hunger Games is coming out, and I got to teach "A Rose for Emily" today, and we'll have our boy soon!

And since only about 3 things fit me anymore because I'm as big as a wooly mammoth (though, thankfully, a little less hairy), I've been taking fashion cues from one Rachel Green.  I am basically wearing this outfit right now.  So you just look at her and pretend that that's me, because I'm pretty sure that there should be no actual  photo documentation of what I actually look like right now.

So, yeah, check back in later and maybe I won't be pregnant anymore.  That'd be nice.



*Which is actually good and fine, because that fits into my plan of having the baby on the 25th, and it works better with school and all of that other bull jive, but man oh man I sure would like to be finished being pregnant RIGHT NOW.

**Turns out it's the latter.  Also, I am a poet.