Mama Grizzly Response

The Mama Grizzlies respond to everyone's favorite nutjob. 



In case you missed it, here's the video they're responding to.  Well, they're responding to that, and the fountain of stupid shit that sprays from that woman's mouth each day.

Kiss My Ass, Sarah Palin.

Hey, Sarah Palin, you piece of shit:  (1:08)




There are a lot of us teachers.  If only some of yours could have taught you how to use the English language. . .

Tell me again about how effective abstinence is.

This and That

A few things to get you through your Monday. (Mondays are my worst days; I have school and then a class--a dreadful class that sucks my soul from my body--and I don't get home until around 7:00. Boo hiss. The up side is that Matt usually has dinner ready for me when I return home, just like a 1950's housewife.)

• First, if you feel like you just can't find the perfect gift for that special someone, try the above rug. It's only 1K, and if you really want, you can have it autographed by Sarah Palin. (Okay, so that last part's a lie, and no polar bears died for the sake of this rug. It's from Etsy, and you can buy it here.)
• Speaking of Etsy, Matt ordered my "Bad Dingo" tote bag just in time. He got the very last one! I am REALLY excited about walking around carrying the bag. When he emailed the seller, he explained to her that our dogson is an American Dingo and had a tag that said that he's a baby eater. (We got him a different tag when he got bigger and more fierce looking. Now it calls him a professional snuggler.)
• Speaking of Matt, he is currently watching football and yelling and clapping. Mitch is lying by my feet under the desk, terrified of his manic father and loud noises.
• Speaking of football, did you see that Smash Williams won the Heisman? I saw that, and I even got to throw out some fake football knowledge during the show, all stuff I've heard Matt say. "You know, Tebow's game won't really transfer to the pros. He plays much more of a running game and he's not as accurate at passing. . .It's basically the difference between Matt Saracen and J.D. McCoy." Everything I know about football I know from listening to Matt talk to his friends and watching Friday Night Lights.
• Speaking of awesome television, 60 Minutes had both Obam' and Ricky Gervais on tonight. It warmed my soul. I think that Ricky Gervais is perhaps the funniest person alive today.
• Speaking of funny, isn't it weird that I've had two cute kid posts lately? Fear not--I do not have Baby Rabies (thanks for the term, Carly!). That shan't happen anytime soon, or ever.
• But speaking of things that shall happen soon, I've only got five glorious days of school until Mitchmas break. Friday the Savannah family is coming for Mitchmas dinner, and my friend Maureen and her husband are coming for New Year's. She's a vegetarian. Any good vegetarian recipes you'd like to share?
• Speaking of food, I feel like I eat enough on a daily basis to feed a small country, or at least an elementary school. It's disgusting and terrible, yet I won't stop. Matt's going to have to knock out walls in our house and invest in a horse trailer just to get me out of the house.

Happy Monday to you! Anything fun happening? What are your plans for Mitchmas?

Martha Hates Sarah Palin, Too!

"She's very boring to me, very boring. And a very, to me, kind of a dangerous person. I mean, she's dangerous. She speaks, she's, she's so confused. And anyone like that in government is a real problem."

I love you, Martha Stewart.

Poison Tax

This summer, when the healthcare debate was in full swing, while the crazies were out taking guns to town hall meetings and screaming about death panels, I saw this commercial. When I saw it my anger swelled within me (which, in addition to the gallons of soda I consume each week, may be part of why I'm so fat!). Really, stupid people? Really?

And then just the other day, I saw this one. Watch it. Watch the anger oozing from this woman as she discusses how the tiny tax on the soda [that's poisoning her children and making them fat and lazy] will break her. Priceless. Well, not really priceless. It has a price--a big price if you ask her. I just hope this genius of a mother will be able to afford her mortgage after the tax goes into effect. I mean, will little Cody and Madison get to go to college? Probably not. Damn soda tax!

I'm a big soda drinker, I'll admit. It's one of my many vices. Occasionally I'll go on some kick where I eliminate soda from my diet, but I always revert to old, bad habits. I crave it and I love it, even though I know that it's poison. I've also calculated before how much money I spend on soda, and it's frightening. We spend hundreds of dollars each year--completely unnecessarily--on soda. If I can spend that much money each year on something so silly, then it won't hurt me to spend an extra nickel or two on it--especially if that money goes toward providing healthcare for people who need it.

OR--if the extra pennies really keep me from being able to pay my bills, perhaps I could make a better choice and drink WATER. Or boxes of wine. Either will make me happy.

Brett and Cam = Awesome

Brett and Cam, two guys from Purdue, decided one day that they were going to give out free compliments. They made a sign, and they did just that. They simply stand on a street corner and compliment people. And they've been having so much fun just complimenting people that they're taking it nationwide with the Brightside Tour. It's Brett, Cam, a sign, and oodles of creativity. (And you can read more about them on their blog.)

I, of course, am too caustic and too full of hatred to be able to do this for more than about 3 minutes. What if Jillian Michaels or Sarah Palin or Heidi and Spencer walked by? I'd be at a loss.

But how about this? Next year, when I assign the ninth graders to detention, I should assign them lunch detentions during which they have to stand in the middle of the cafeteria with a sign, complimenting everyone who passes. I bet that'll make them sit down and be quiet! Brilliant!

(picture stolen from the Brightside Tour website)

Don't Mess with Dave

You know the list? The list from Friends, the one where you name the five celebrities you are allowed to sleep with without your spouse getting mad at you? Well, these two men are on mine. David Letterman has been on mine forever. I love this man. (And I wouldn't kick Obam' out of bed for eating cookies.)

I do not love this woman.

Sarah Palin offends me to the core of my being. I think that she is disgusting, stupid, an opportunist, and an insult to women. Every time I hear her run her mouth I feel the need to donate more money to Obama and Planned Parenthood. She is a symbol of everything I loathe.

One thing I hate is teenage pregnancy, or more specifically, people having kids they're not capable of raising, regardless of their age. I also hate abstinence-only sex education. It's even more stupid than Sarah Palin.

Sarah Palin and her daughter Bristol are proponents of abstinence-only sex education. You know, because it's been really effective for them. Sarah Palin has paraded her daughter--and now her grandson--around for the better part of a year.

And now she's mad at my boyfriend Dave because he made a joke about her daughter being knocked up. She's insisting that 1.) he was talking about her 14-year old (which he was not), 2.) that he is some kind of pedophile supporter of raping 14-year olds, 3.) Dave Letterman cannot be trusted around a 14-year old girl. Opportunist? Stupid? Check. Check.

If there was something that could make me hate this woman more, she just found it. Hey, Dummy, if you throw your knocked-up, abstinence-promoting daughter into the national spotlight, expect some criticism. Expect some jokes. If you don't want your daughter to face such criticism, don't put her out there.

I myself will mock a knocked-up idiot 18-year old any day of the week. And her incompetent mother, too.

Go Dave!